Processing Grief

Oh my goodness! There has been so much devastation and tragedy recently—Houston, Florida Keys, Mexico, Puerto Rico and Las Vegas—grief upon grief upon grief. Perhaps you are witnessing this grief on the news and not personally. But the assault on our senses has an impact on us. It’s also an assault on our assumption of safety, which is quickly eroding if not already eradicated. How many of us are losing sleep because we are fearful? Watching the news we want to vomit, cry, wail, or count our blessings because we know that could have been any of us.

Perhaps you not only watching the news but you were personally effected by your own recent losses—you buried your beloved father recently, or your best friend was diagnosed with terminal illness. What do we do with all this GRIEF?

The clinical term is PROCESS. Why is it important to process? Because it truly helps your healing journey—whether it’s talking with someone who lovingly validates, or doing some expressive arts (collage, poem), or walking with reflective intention, or journal. There are many ways to do something with that grief energy as opposed to doing nothing with the fear, helplessness, loneliness, and all the other feelings that accompany grief.  

The following are examples of two women who took steps to process.  

Leslie A. Westbrook wrote about her many losses for an article in The Independent—a weekly Santa Barbara newspaper.  As I read, I felt deeply about the way she was honoring the people whom she loved and lost and about the way she honored her own feelings. The beginning of the article is captivating. You’ll want to read the rest. Click on the link below.     

Dear Grief, It’s time to take a break. I have spent way too much time with you. The death of my father along with 20 other friends, family members, and neighbors in 2014 was unfathomable and had me reeling. I didn’t think you had it in you to come back so soon — but sure enough, there you were again in 2015, back with a vengeance.

Next is a book of poems that I have referenced before. One of her amazing poems is in my book. Susan Cochran’s husband, Jim died suddenly in 2010. Although grieving deeply, she was such an example to our Widows’ Group of how to process or move that grief energy around. This year she published In the Sea of Grief and Love, a compilation of the many poems she wrote about her loss. They are so honest and loving and powerful. You can buy Susan’s book on Amazon.    

Thank you so much to all who attended my presentations at La Casa de Maria and Hospice of Santa Barbara. I really appreciate you.

Please remember to buy my book on my website instead of Amazon if you want to support the mission of Courage Road.                                   

Posted on October 6, 2017 .